(this is me when I realize I have free will to post whatever I want on my blog. All opinions are my own hehe)
Last night, the internet was buzzing about the shocking and dramatic finale of the twenty-first season of “The Bachelorette.” The tweets, TikToks, and Instagram comments are all in agreement: perhaps the franchise really did make good on their promise for the most “shocking” and “dramatic” finale in Bachelor Nation history.
So let’s unpack it…
We knew things were awry from the beginning of the 3-hour special. Two of Jenn’s final five, Jeremy and Jonathan, sat front row in the audience. Both expressed that they “heard about how things went” and were there to show support. Jonathan said he was there to support Jenn. Jeremy said he was there to support Jenn but also Marcus and Devin, his “brothers.”
Bachelor Nation is nothing if not a group of sleuths that will find out a contestants’ family history, Twitter likes from 2010, and what political party they are registered as. With that in mind, there’s a reason Jeremy’s comment about those men being his “brothers” is not a great look.
So let’s start there. By episode nine, Jenn has dwindled down the twenty five men to two. Marcus Shoberg is a former army ranger whose origin story of abandonment and foster care tugged at the heartstrings of America. Devin Strader, who resides in Houston, is the owner of a freight company and has butted heads with many other men this season.
Within the last few months, discussions on Reddit have got people talking about sexual assault allegations against Marcus. This makes those tearful shots of the Minnesota native on the beach so much more unbelievable.
As for Devin, a music track was discovered from when he had aspirations to be a rapper under the name of 96dev (I can’t believe how ridiculous it is either). This track included derogatory and racist language. Apparently he also liked a host of posts with anti-LGBTQ, anti-vaccine, and anti-immigration sentiments. When will people learn to delete their problematic tweets and likes before going on national television? 🤦🏽♀️ Strader seemed to be doing some damage control of his own once the show started airing. He deleted 17 of his own posts, unfollowed 300 accounts, and unliked those controversial posts. He was also said to be liking multiple posts that supported Biden/Harris and commenting things like “imagine being a Trumper in 2024” on posts.
So as it seems, both of our final contestants seem to be in some hot water. And we’ve seen in previous seasons how information can come out in between filming and After The Final Rose (ATFR) that can change the lead’s decision, for example in the case of Hannah Brown and Matt James’ seasons.
But if we’re staying with what’s happening in the episodes, Devin has said he loves Jenn. Marcus has not. Meanwhile, Jenn told Marcus she loved him, and told Devin shortly after. Jenn’s confession of love for Devin came only after a tearful conversation in Jenn’s hotel room when Devin basically expressed he couldn’t go on until he heard it back. He said that he has “risked everything for” Jenn, namely his “feelings” and “sanity”. After that emotional conversation, Jenn hugged Devin and let out a “Devin, I do love you, you freaking idiot.” It was almost out of a romcom and Bachelor nation was surely eating it up. Personally, I felt like the conversation cornered Jenn and made her feel like she had to say it. Devin expressed that it would hurt him if he said “I love you” to Jenn and she turned around and said it to someone else, which is essentially what happened. And I feel like the lead saying “I love you” to two people has become way too normalized in the franchise. It was a huge deal when Ben Higgins did it for the first time, and now no one blinks an eye.
Nevertheless, all eyes are on Jenn now. Will she pick the guy who has expressed so strongly that he will choose her everyday, that he loves her, and has made so many grand gestures to show her that? Or will she pick that guy that she said “I love you” to first, and who is “trying to get there” with her? As for me and my household (my mother and I), our bets were on Devin. I really liked Marcus and felt for his past trauma that I felt like wasn’t allowing him to fully love Jenn. I was also sympathetic to the fact that this whole process is crazy and he might have been feeling the uncertainty of being able to fall in love with someone in such a short amount of time. However, as my mother expressed, there were twenty five men at the beginning of this journey, many of which really liked Jenn and were sad to go home. There’s no reason for Jenn to pick someone that’s unsure of her! If Marcus doesn’t love her yet the question is why are you still here? And if you really have that many issues when it comes to romance and relationships, the question still stands.
As for Devin, what I thought was interesting about his journey is that he wasn’t necessarily a fan favorite. Many fans either loved him, hated him, or hated him and then learned to love him. Strader also made some enemies within the mansion, namely Sam M. and Aaron. While neither of them made it very far in the journey, both expressed that they thought Devin “wasn’t there for the right reasons.” To me, it seems like Devin was the lesser of two evils, or perhaps just the more likable guy, in both of these rivalries making him the one who stuck around. For a second there it seemed like Devin was going to be painted as the villain of this season, but ultimately Sam M. gave himself that title (well of course, until last night). Aaron on the other hand went home in episode three for an opportunity in the Air Force. What’s interesting to me is that usually the disliked characters of each season eventually get weeded out by the end. The final three are usually the less problematic contestants because everyone’s true colors have been shown to the lead by then. Many fans who didn’t like Devin thought it was cringey how Jenn defended him when fighting with the other guys. But despite Devin’s perceived “disrespect” for the other men, it was all with the ultimate goal to talk to Jenn, which is why I think he made it as far as he did. It seemed like he kept “the main thing the main thing”… or so we thought.
I’m going to skip ahead to the final episode. To break it down, Jenn decides that she can’t go on with a relationship with Marcus that is built on him “trying” and “caring about her.” She also expressed that she has always let the guy determine the conditions of the relationship and her decisions and that she was done doing that. After a tearful conversation in Marcus’ hotel room where he did end up saying that he loves Jenn, it was too little too late. Once again, I felt like this confession of love was forced and Marcus’ last chance attempt at trying to keep Jenn around because he really liked her but was still unsure. Jenn and Marcus ultimately break up and don’t go on a final date.
Nevertheless, with one guy still in Hawaii, Jenn decides that she isn’t going to let Devin propose to her, but rather she is going to propose to him.
Things are happy! The day prior, the two go on a final date and let go of their fears for the relationship in a spiritual Hawaiian ceremony. Jenn talked about her fear of abandonment, due to her dad not being a part of her life. Consequently, Devin gave her a sentimental gift from one of their other previous dates promising to be there for her. Cue the b-roll of Devin walking in front of palm trees as Jenn’s voiceover explains how he has been sure of her this entire journey. But wait, why are we back to the live studio with Jesse Palmer?
Jenn comes out in the live studio and we watch her cry and gasp for air for what feels like way too long. She explains how her relationship with Devin completely changed after their engagement, where they proposed to one another. Devin began to have doubts about their relationship and felt differently about Jenn. She couldn’t get him to respond to text messages or have a full conversation about what was going on. They had a Happy Couple (a retreat center for the Bachelor couples to spend time together in secret) scheduled and Jenn said that Devin called her beforehand and broke off the engagement in a 15-min phone call. If you think it can’t get worse, it does.
Tran also explained how she woke up the next morning to Devin following girls on Instagram, namely Maria Georgas from Joey’s season. The GASP in the studio was LOUD. Georgas was a fan favorite from Joey’s season and she said the Bachelorette role was “hers until she said it wasn’t.” She apparently went so far into the process that she was doing fittings for dresses before ultimately deciding it wasn’t the right time for her. Prior to the announcement that Jenn was going to be the Bachelorette, Georgas and final runner up Daisy Kent, had both been rumored to have secured the spot.
This is where the larger discussion about the franchise’s attempts at diversity begins. When Tran was announced, they made it a point to highlight how she was the first Asian American Bachelorette ever and how big of a step this was for representation. However, the casting for The Bachelorette season begins before the lead is announced. With rumors of Kent and Georgas prior, many of the men on Jenn’s season were casted thinking that they were going to be pursuing someone different. Which means that, sadly, Jenn was set up for failure from the start.
Unfortunately, it’s not the first time Daisy and Maria came up in Jenn’s season. On a group date, Sam M. plainly stated that he thought that the bachelorette was going to be one of those two and that Jenn “wasn’t his type” but was willing to give it a try. The fact that a grown man doesn’t know NOT to say something like that is baffling. The other men on the date were also shocked. But to me that doesn’t mean they didn’t feel similarly, maybe they just knew not to say it. We’ll never know for sure what their initial reactions were to Jenn being announced, but like I said before, I think she was cruelly put in a position that did not allow her to succeed as much as she could have.
And if ABC was going to praise Jenn as the first Asian American Bachelorette, the least they could have done was let the men know that and back out if they wanted to. My guess is that due to contractual obligations, this was not an option. If they had been able to recast, perhaps there would have been more Asian men on this season too. Not to mention, they could have at least screened these men to make sure that they’ve never done anything that would be offensive to a minority woman.
Devin’s interactions with Jenn’s family members seemed altogether pretty genuine. One thing I found a little icky was how he responded to Jenn’s mom’s question about having ever dated an asian girl before. He said “no” and then said how “it wasn’t about that for him” and then proceeded to talk more about the relationship and what he wanted to be for her. For some, this might be sufficient. For me, I think that there is nothing more cringey than someone in an interracial relationship saying something along the lines of “I don’t see race” or “I don’t care about that”, or “it’s not about that”. It’s actually ALL about that (race actually plays into every part of our lives but that is beyond the scope of this essay). When you’re in an interracial relationship, you’re agreeing to have someone by your side that does not look like you, a fact that this cruel and harsh world might not take lightly. Not only that, but if you are married and you become one flesh (by biblical standards lol) you have to understand that person’s race and how it informs their culture, thinking, and beliefs. If you’re going to have children one day, understanding that also means understanding part of who they are as well. And if you can’t do that, I actually don’t know if you can really love a person. With that all being said, 96dev’s rap tracks don’t make his case any better.
And unfortunately, the producers’ mistreatment and disregard doesn’t stop at the casting. After Jenn and Devin reunited and Jenn fired reasonable question after question to Devin–leaving him shifting uncomfortably in his seat–their proposal was STILL shown to the live studio audience. Not only was it aired, but Jenn had to watch it, sitting next to Devin, with a reaction cam in the corner of the screen. Viewers have taken to social media to express how indecent, cruel, and vile this decision was. Many of us would have been happy to NOT watch this, yet they left a heartbroken woman on the stage with no choice but to succumb to watching what she thought was the happiest day of her life next to a man who left her. I’ve seen tweets and TikToks of people swearing off anything Bachelor Franchise related as a result of this decision. I think it was disrespectful, stupid, and cruel. Former Bachelor, Ben Higgins took to Twitter to let us know how he thought Jenn should have handled it.
Jenn has recently expressed she was glad it happened because it forced Devin to watch it back too and see all the promises he made her. I still think that could have happened without showing Jenn breaking down. Following the proposal, Jesse Palmer softly spoke to Jenn and said that he hoped a small part of her still feels empowered by what she did and how she did things her way. Despite Jenn’s tears and the audience’s applause, I saw right through ABC’s attempt at trying to make the drama meaningful for Jenn. What it really was was the exploitation of a human being, their feelings, and their broken reality.
Yes, this is reality TV, but it’s also so much more. A few months ago I got the chance to talk with the CEO of a reality TV production company. Both him and his Head of Development told me that they LOVED reality TV. For them it wasn’t “trash tv”. Rather it helped to inform how they operate within their own relationships. There are plenty of articles that unpack the sociological impact of watching reality television. As Danielle J. Lindemann, a sociology professor says in an article from Columbia Magazine, “I see reality TV as a kind of fun-house mirror, because it can show us ourselves in caricatured or amplified form. The genre reveals some of the worst things about society — sexism, racism, classism, materialism — and dials them up to eleven.”
After watching this season, I have learned the importance of being able to articulate specific things that I want in a partner, being able to see how they fulfill my desires in actions rather than words, and being able to really explain how and why I love a person. It also made me aware of how scarily well people can put on an act. Throughout the season, I felt like discussions about love, expectations, and goals were so abstract and a little fluffy. And while I would never say that the way things ended were Jenn’s fault, I do think it’s a possibility that Devin seemed perfect because no one was really digging that deep.
However, what makes this season different for me than any other season of The Bachelor is that it’s not the content that’s making me reflect the most, but rather the process and who’s behind the camera.
These producers had Jenn walk into a group of men that didn’t sign up to date an Asian woman on a show that is historically dominated by white men and women. They didn’t seem to vet any of these men for behavior that could be offensive to Jenn (like someone with a past of using derogatory and racist language). And they then humiliated her in the last episode, with nothing but a commercial break between her sobs and the Golden Bachelorette promo. I’m left asking “where has empathy and respect gone in television production?”.
Over the years, as content creators have become more popular, the show has made it clear that it’s not making sure to weed out contestants who are simply coming for clout and followers (hence the popular phrase “not here for the right reasons”). With the rising popularity of the show, the benefits that a person can have from just being a contestant are better than ever. Being a loved member of Bachelor Nation means potentially hooking up with previous contestants you may have liked, brand deals, and potentially another paid appearance on television via Bachelor In Paradise.
For me, the videos on TikTok of Jeremy at the club with Maria are so much more disgusting to watch now. Too many fans have let him off the hook for partying with Devin, post-breakup, in New York. He was still in the final five and it’s not unreasonable to think he had hoped Maria was the bachelorette as well. It seems he has wasted no time in mingling with other members of Bachelor Nation and perhaps trying to shoot his shot. (I did not like this man before and now I really don’t like him)
It’s not the first time the franchise has failed at diversity or protecting its leads. In Matt James’ season, the first black Bachelor, his final pick, Rachel Kirkconnell was discovered to have attended an offensive antebellum-themed party. Fans could not comprehend how she was now engaged to a black man. The two called off their engagement before getting back together to date months after the final episode aired. There’s more to unpack in terms of Matt James’ identity as a black man and how he came to terms with the past actions of his girlfriend, but that’s beyond the scope of this essay. However, producers of the show sat down with the LA Times and admitted that they didn’t protect their first black bachelor and are committed to protecting their minority leads. After last night, it seems like their promises are just as empty as Devin’s.
Fans have also pointed out that Charity Lawson, the second black Bachelorette, seemed to have been “the real winner of this season.” Not only did she have multiple appearances throughout the season but also brand deals and a second free trip to Greece with her fiancee. In retrospect, I have to wonder if this was an attempt to make sure people know that the franchise can be diverse. It’s likely that having the character of a successful black love story throughout the season could be a very good look (and a fantastic marketing ploy) for the network.
The most difficult part to come to terms with is that The Bachelor cares more about pumping out new content every season, with a short time span in between, than it does about caring about the contestants and the final product. You might be saying to yourself “well yeah, it’s a reality tv show.” But like I tried to say before, it’s so much more. And after twenty one seasons of this show, I would hope that the producers are able to see that too. There are multiple happy couples that have come out of the franchise, but many people have stopped watching over the years due to its bad casting and lack of diversity, among other things.
Last night Jennifer Tran had to come face to face with the truth of how she was valued by those men and by the show. Ultimately, what was supposed to be a “trailblazing” season for the first Asian American bachelorette was a finale that reminded us that she was there to check a box and that some men were only ever there for a white woman instead.
Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.
(slow nod and walk away)
Okay here are some good tweets from last night:
https://twitter.com/TheBachBabes/status/1831169267934384497
Spring Cleaning 
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